Bill Simmons NFL Playoffs Round 2 Picks

"That reminds me, I know the extra bulk is part of the Bettis package, but isn't there a difference between 'carrying a little extra weight' and 'looking like Chris Farley doing the Motivational Speaker sketch'? How could Bettis possibly be in shape? He's all stomach fat and butt crack at this point. What happens if they need a few extra carries from him in an overtime game or something? It's acceptable to be a professional athlete with a 49.9 percent body fat percentage? Nobody has a problem with this? Poor Jerome is crammed into that XXL Steelers jersey like Kelly Osbourne trying to slide into one of Hillary Duff's Juicy Couture cutoff T-shirts. Does he have to pay William 'the Refrigerator' Perry royalties every time he scores?"